Practice Makes Perfect

Some days I feel like my kids have two volumes: loud and super LOUD. Most days I feel like they have two speeds: fast and out of control. And occasionally I just feel like I can’t keep up.

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I honestly can’t remember at what point I lost it. It might have been after the explosion of chokecherry syrup all over the floor. It could have been between the “Mom, can I hold the baby?” “But I asked first!” and the “But Mo-om, I didn’t get to yet!” fight that never seems to take a break. Or maybe it was when I walked in their room to find the freshly folded laundry piles I’d hoped they would put away scattered hither and yon. It really could have been when I glanced down into the family room to witness our two-year-old Evil Keneviling it from the top of our futon to the couch 6 feet away. Or during the pillow fight that ended abruptly with bonked heads and two boys in tears. But no matter when it happened. Fact is, it did. I lost it.

IMG_1690Countless times since becoming a mom I have found myself praying for more patience. Begging that I won’t go crazy, and asking for forgiveness for those all-too-often times I do. Some days after negotiating with a non-negotiable two-year-old and pleading for a truce between two brothers that know exactly which buttons to push on each other leaves me completely exhausted. I pray for patience. For what to say, what to do, how to put out this fire or that.

I pray wanting a solution, a quick fix. But Heavenly Father must know that practice makes perfect because my answer often comes in that form: a chance to try again. And again, and again, and again, and again.

He answers me with that quiet prompting, “pick yourself back up. Keep on trying, you can do it. Practice makes perfect! You’ll get it one of these days.” And I step back in the ring.

Motherhood is a choice you make every day, to put someone else’s happiness and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when you’re not sure what the right thing is…and to forgive yourself, over and over again, for doing everything wrong.” –Donna Ball

It’s so easy to feel like we do everything wrong. Over and over again. It’s so hard to forgive ourselves, to pick ourselves back up and practice that patience we so desperately want and need. But someday, if we just keep trying, I think we can get it right. And it’s my prayer every day that my kids won’t be too much worse for the wear because I had to practice so much.

In those moments that I just can’t keep up, I am always grateful for the chance to try again. I’m so thankful that children are forgiving. Most of all, I’m thankful that I have been given this great opportunity to practice patience on four amazing little boys. Boys that have two volumes and two speeds. Sometimes I feel like they give me more than my fair share of opportunities to give it another go. But then I get that quiet nudge, “practice makes perfect! Pick yourself back up. Keep trying,” and I remember I wouldn’t want it any other way.

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8 Comments on “Practice Makes Perfect

  1. Oh! You had him…Crawfish No. 4! Congrats! And please…..you’re entitled to lose it every once in a while…..it gives you the chance to show those boys regret, apology, and how to pick yourself back up and to keep on going. Chelsi, the thing that matters the most is that the core is love….if you have that deep within you, those boys are going to feel that even when you lose it. And someday, probably not that far down the line, you’re going to lose it and one of those little boys is going to put their hand on your shoulder and give you a look and you’re going to see that same love deep within him. And then you’ll cry because you’ll know how very well you did.

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    • Thank you Torrie! YES! He came! Not exactly a very great way to announce. I guess I got to ranting and forgot I hadn’t introduced the new little guy to my blog yet. He’s pretty great, and his brothers smother him with love, for better or for worse. 🙂 I’ll be writing about him soon.

      Thanks for the encouragement. I’d never thought of it as a teaching tool when I loose it, but you’re right! It’s not just about learning patience, but teaching apology and showing love. They went on a trip with their grandparents this past week and oh, how I’m missing all the noise and craziness!

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  2. Oh my, I can relate. I love your words here. (And seriously, look at you blogging after having a baby like a week or so ago!) I feel like my temper is the thing that leaves me with guilt the most. I try and try to be patient, to be loving, to be kind, but when I’m exhausted, emotionally drained, stressed (which I’m sure could describe your situation right now, if it is anything like when I had Parker) I lose it. And AS SOON as the moment has passed I’m filled with guilt. I wonder why I couldn’t hold it together, take a deep breath and relax. But, the truth is, it seems like as mothers we get good at something, but then we add another pregnancy into the mix, another child, a child grows up and things change, etc… and so we don’t see how far we’ve come. We just see ourselves losing it. But the truth is, I’m sure you are far more patience than you were with you had your first. I imagine you would rock having just one child now. But life continues to stretch us, so we just keep going…. You are amazing, Chelsi! Keep listening to those words from God to your heart, because they are true, and they are true for me too–pick yourself up. practice makes perfect. Keep trying! 🙂

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    • I always thought I was a very patient person until I had kids…I love them more than words and I hate it when I let the little things get the best of me! Yes, I love what you said about how as soon as we feel like things are under control and we have life figured out, something always changes. I guess that’s the point, so we can learn and grow. I heard a talk once about the “bountifuls” in our lives and how we aren’t meant to stay, because there’s something so much better and more beautiful promised ahead. Thanks so much for your encouragement, Marla! I love reading your comments because I feel like I’m not alone and you always build me back up.

      I hope that you are feeling good again and that this little GIRL 🙂 🙂 🙂 is doing well! I’m just so excited for you and I can’t wait for Parker to have his little sister here!

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